At a doctor\'s office one morning, a patient arrives complaining of serious
backache. The doctor examines him and asks him: \"What the hell did you do
to your back? \"

The patient replies: \"You know that I work for a local night club? Today
morning, I got home to my apartment early, and heard a noise in my bedroom.
On entering, I knew someone had been sleeping with my wife and the balcony
door was open. I rushed out of the balcony and not find anyone. As I looked
down from the balcony, I saw a man running out and he was dressing himself.
I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him. That\'s how I strained my back. \"

The 2nd patient arrives looking as if he was in a car wreck. The doctor
says: \"My previous patient looked bad, but you look terrible. What the hell
happened to you? \" He replies: \"You know I have been unemployed for a while
now, today was the first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and
was running late out of the building, getting dressed at the same time, and
you won\'t believe it, but I was hit by a fridge.\"

The 3rd patient arrives; he looks even worse than the other two patients
do. The doctor is shocked. Again asks: \"What the hell happened to you?\"
\"Well, I was sitting in a fridge and someone threw it from the 3rd floor!

A young boy went to his father and asked,
" What's the difference between potentially and realistically?"

The father answered,
"Go ask your mother if she would sleep with George Clooney for one million dollars. Then go ask your sister if she would sleep with Ricky Martin for one
million dollars. Then come back and tell me what you have learned. "

So the boy went to his mother and asked,
"Would you sleep with George Clooney for one million dollars?"
The mother replied, "Of course I would. I wouldn't pass up an opportunity like that!"

Then the boy went to his sister and asked,
"Would you sleep with Ricky Martin for one million dollars?"
The girl replied,
"Oh my gosh! I'd be nuts to pass that up!"

The boy thought about it and went back to his dad.

His father asked him if he'd found out the difference between
"potentially and realistically."

The boy replied,
"Yes. 'Potentially' we're sitting on two million dollars, but 'realistically' we're living
with two whores."

A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.

" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!